Let’s Talk About It

I got the call at work, and I can't remember if I called my partner or my dad first. It's kind of a blur.

What I do remember is my mind immediately went to my son, three at the time, and what it all means for him. Although I had been preparing myself for this moment over the past couple of months, the words from my genetic counselor still stung.

You did test positive for the familial BRCA, one mutation that your father and great uncle have. I think back to the day my parents sat my partner and I down. We were in California on an unusually warm October weekend, celebrating my brother and new sister in law, the wildfires had moved closer, filling the air with smoke. My dad tested positive for what I should now take the same test.

I was terrified.

I never imagined a genetic link to cancer ran in our family before then, cancer wasn't really on my radar. After this distressing yet necessary conversation, I started thinking about cancer nearly every day. A year and a half has passed since I learned I'm now at high risk for developing breast and ovarian cancer.

My fear has lessened ever so slightly. In two months, we'll welcome a second child into the world, my family will watch me tackle multiple surgeries to remove major body parts to hopefully stay cancer free for years to come. But there is no guarantee I'm not always as strong as my four year old thinks I am, but I show my true emotions and answer any questions as honestly as I can in the coming years, our family will continue to talk about my kids' own risks and how important and amazing genetic testing and science are.

My genetic mutation is not a secret, nor is it something to be ashamed of. It's simply a reality that needs to be talked about.