The 20th Day, by preejo, Chennai

Born, raised, and currently residing in Chennai, Tamil Nadu, preejo is a corporate trainer.

I'm driving around the city, my car loaded with cooked food and water bottles. Each time I see a homeless person on the street, I stop the car, get out, offer them food and water. 

Throughout the day, I cover different parts of the city, covered in a PPE suit and mask. As the day goes on, tiredness sinks in, and the scorching sun only makes it worse. I decide to take a break, some rest time, and to return few calls.

An hour later, I resume work, and as I reach the next spot for the day, I notice something. At first, I am not sure of what I am seeing. I take a good look to confirm it. I see a homeless man feeding on leftovers, off the street.

Oh no. No, no, no. I know this guy, he can't speak or hear. I have been offering him food for the past three weeks, and now he is just eating bread crumbs from the ground.

Damn you, Preejo! What did you just do? You came late, and now this guy has to eat leftovers from the street.

I don’t know what to do. I feel extremely guilty. I take a couple of minutes to gather myself, and get out of the car with a food packet and bottle of water. I walk up to him and offer both.

With teary eyes, I say, “I'm really sorry! Please eat this!”

I gesture to him, to make him understand how sorry I am.

I stand there for a while, my mind not functioning, feeling responsible for the whole thing. He starts eating the food I offered. I just sit there at a distance, watching him eat, and thankfully not from the ground this time. I’m so lost. I curse and blame myself… 

Preejo, you started this relief work to help people, but you are doing a shoddy job of it.

You are not the right person for this! Anyway, you were contemplating ending this due to exhaustion… I guess this is it. This is just too much to handle. I can't do this anymore, can't see people eating from the street.

Meanwhile, the man finishes eating, and I’m planning to head back home. That's when another homeless man from the adjacent street shows up.

He asks, in Tamil “What are you doing here sir, I was just wondering what happened to you, how come you still haven't showed up, and what will I do for food today?”

I tell him what happened.

He hears me out and says, “We patiently expect your arrival with food, sir, that's the best part of our day. We completely rely on the food you give us.”

I say, “I understand, but I don't think I can do this anymore, it’s too much for me to handle, and I can't see people having food from the ground. 

He replies, “Yes, for survival, this person had food from the ground, and it's not an easy thing to see, but what about the other hundreds of people like me, who are completely relying on the food you give? Which is better, sir? Seeing us having food from the ground, or seeing us dead on the street?”

That statement hits me hard, boom! It brings me back to reality.

Quietly, I go to the car, pick up food and water for the man, offer it to him, and say, “I will come every day without fail.”

I couldn't sleep that night. The situation made me more determined; my only focus was to reach out to more people, and save more lives.

As the COVID-19 lockdowns came to an end, I ended my relief work after one hundred and eleven days.  

Money raised: 14,42,356

Number of people fed: 173,470

The image of the homeless man eating leftovers from the street has never left me.

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(This story was prepared for an “Imagine Another World” online storytelling workshop held October 14, 2020.)

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