My Family, My Safe Space, by Rekha Sarma, Project Associate

By Rekha Sarma, Guwahati

Life before lockdown was … it was so different. I was running around. Now, I’m inside my home.

My family used to always complain that I’m never at home, I never spend time with them. So I thought, “OK, I will spend time with my family now.” But from the day lockdown started, I have been busy over the phone, I have been doing Zoom calls, I’m constantly talking to the kids I work with. Most of them come from poor backgrounds. They are with fathers who abuse them and their mothers. I’m always in touch, I try to give them emotional support however I can.

Every day, my father, my brother, my niece want to spend time, play with me, listen to stories about my life. But I don’t have the time. My mother understands. She says, “We have made her capable of this, so she is doing what she always wanted, what we wanted; we have to support her.” My parents are trying their best. I know they want their daughter near them, but they are also understanding.

I lost a young girl who was very close to me, during the lockdown. I didn’t get the chance to see her for a last time, to say goodbye. Her family lives in a remote area, they cannot easily call me. But they managed to call me and inform me. They said, “She is dead.” I tried to go there, but I cannot go. I still don’t know what happened to her.

The news was first received by my team. When they shared that she had died, my brain was not working. The moment I disconnected the call, I got a call from her best friend. I don’t know how I managed. I spoke to her, I tried to make her feel better. When we hung up, I started crying. Everyone was calling me to support me. That was wonderful. My family was my big support. They’ve helped me to come out of this.

Born a woman comes with its own challenges, but we need to create a space with people who understand us and help us grow.

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Rekha was a member of our amazing team of Project Associates based in Kolkata, who assisted with all aspects of the online storytelling workshops, from recruitment to facilitation.